May 212011

So, in case any of you missed the memo, the end of the world is nigh. Nigh, as in NOW. I have to admit that as a young teen, I had some experience with Pentecostal Christians, tales of The Rapture, The Bride of Christ being taken away and the rest of us ( OBVIOUSLY the cool /fun people) left behind. To me, this just means that I can now afford REALLY NICE STUFF if all the stores will be unmanned. Looting, anyone??


By the way, I’m here to say that I unequivocally call BULLSHIT on this. There. You heard it here first, kids.

All this Rapture rap got me thinking, though, about being ‘enraptured’ and what that means.

Enraptured: tr.v. en·rap·tured, en·rap·tur·ing, en·rap·tures: To fill with rapture or delight.

en·rapture·ment : n. Synonyms: enrapture, entrance2, ravish, thrill, transport
These verbs mean to have a powerful, agreeable, and often overwhelming emotional effect on someone.

I know that regular readers of this blog might think that my relationship with Whitman is fraught with drama…what  with all of the email-reading, Dom/sub, naughty points, extra people-fucking, etc. We sound like a couple of insecure whacked out sex-crazed kids sometimes.

But TRULY, I AM ENRAPTURED. DAILY (see definitions above).  I am AMAZED daily by the love that we have. I am delighted and filled with wonderment at how this love found me, or found us. I thrill every moment that we are together and think constantly about the next time that we will be together.  I CAN’T BELIEVE I’m so lucky to have this man in my life. Overwhelming. Really.

That being said, since today’s OBVIOUSLY everyone’s last day on Earth, let’s GET FUCKING, FOLKS!

May 152011

I have an issue. It’s an inability to TALK during sex. It’s an inability to communicate, really. I think lots of things, and it turns out that sometimes I THINK I’ve SAID the things out loud, but not really. It’s a very strange short-circuit between my sexy bits and my brain.  The short list of things I think / think I’ve said when fucking or being fucked by Whitman goes something like this (in no particular order):

OHYES your mouth feels so good on my cunt!
OHMYGODYES Fuck. Me Harder!
I love your big hard cock, ohmygod it’s so perfect!
NEVER stop fucking me! I want you to FUCK ME ALL NIGHT LONG!
Oh, no! Not the <toy / instrument of pleasure / instrument of pain>!
Oh, YESSS!! The  <toy / instrument of pleasure / instrument of pain>!
Fuck my ass! Yes, yes, yes, I want you to fuck my ass!
I want you in my ass,  balls deep!

Breakthrough!  The other day, naked with my ass propped in the air (which was being inspected and smacked and FINALLY fucked  balls-deep by Whitman), I was THINKING those last four on the list. As he pounded my ass, It was VERY IMPORTANT to me that I convey to him “Please don’t stop.” The most I was able to formulate was the ‘YES! YES! FUCK YESSS!’

It did the trick. He didn’t stop. He was shocked, however, by my use of ACTUAL WORDS. He claims it’s the first. time. ever.

When he mentioned it, I told Whitman him that no, I’m pretty sure I’ve SAID THINGS out loud before, like “Fuck.” “OHMYGODFUCK.” or “Ohyes!” He insists no, that I mostly just ‘speak’ in variations of heavy breathing (I think this includes different ‘sex sounds’ like moaning and whimpering as well). I’m pretty sure this was a one-time event, BUT I’m PERFECTLY WILLING to try again to find out.  ;)

May 032011

From our Tumblr site at, it’s Top Tumblr Tuesday #8.

This weeks top tumblr is a sex position known as the RUSTY TROMBONE.

Rusty trombone is a euphemism for a sexual act in which a man stands with his knees and back slightly bent, with feet at least shoulder width apart in order to expose the anus.[1] The other partner typically kneels behind the man and performs analingus while reaching up beneath the testicles or around the body to manually administer rapid up and down motions of the penis, mimicking the motions of a trombone player.[1][2]

Rusty Trombone

Click the photo to see it larger on our Tumblr site.

Come to think of it, I haven’t received my rusty trombone yet. Ahem. Is my SexFairy reading this? She better be. I’ll report on the results soon.

And on a funny note, apparently in some couples, one partner’s understanding of what a “rusty trombone” is, is different than the others!

Husband wants a rusty trombone for his birthday

She needs to read up on sexual terms or metallurgy, as of course, trombones are made of brass, which does not rust.

Apr 252011

SexFairy asked me what I want in this recent post.

She deserves an answer:

Blonde Brunette RedheadI want blonde.
I want brunette.
I want redhead.
I want white, black, asian, latino.
I want shaved, landing strip, hairy.
I want one, two, three.
I want to be gentle. I want to be rough.
I want to keep you pure. I want to make you dirty.
I want to respect you. I want to humiliate you.
I want to own you. I want to share you.
I want to be only yours. I want you to taste her on my cock.
I want us to be always honest about what we want, to want it all, and spend the rest of our lives together going after the world.

Mar 172011

Just  like I am about sex, I’m also very open minded about music. Rock, rap, trance, country, whatever, I like it. Whitman likes all kinds of music, too…rock, folk, opera, whatever. He has, however, declared a blanket dislike of country music. I started thinking about this yesterday. I’m not the BIGGEST country fan, but there are times when it’s appropriate. I found Whitman’s closed-mindedness on the subject unusual, and determined to talk to him about it…out of curiosity, of course. He had other ideas.

When I arrived at his place yesterday evening for our mid-week “conjugal visit,” I had a cocktail, and then started trying to get to the root of his dislike. Is it from unfamiliarity, or he doesn’t like the music, or the lyrics, or what?? How can you NOT LIKE classic Merle Haggard?? Blah, blah, blah…

Fast-forward to cocktail #2, and I was STILL talking about it. Non-stop.
I was on a mission, and just kept on and on AND ON about it, until finally Whitman interrupted,
“Did you bring the gag?”  I paused for the briefest second and thought about it, then replied, “Nope.” I resumed my tirade, following him into the bedroom talking non-stop as he rummaged for something.

He held up what he’d found.
I didn’t have the gag with me because HE HAD IT there already! He walked over to me, and as I continued to babble about music, he popped the gag in my mouth. (It’s more of a PACIFIER than a ball gag, and it served the purpose perfectly). He said, “Most of the time you’re the perfect woman. Right now, you’re talking wayyyy too much.”
Not only was I instantly silenced, I was instantly wet, so very  wet.

He pulled the strap tightly around my head, and all I could do was whimper and suck the gag that filled my mouth while I removed my clothes as instructed. Whitman did express some disappointment that he wouldn’t be able to fuck my face with this gag in place, but he did enjoy the chance to fuck me everywhere else in peace.

Mar 162011

Don’t get me wrong. I love, LOVE, LOVE Really.

This post about “anonymous sex bloggers / liars” just ticks me off, though. It’s unfortunate that it’s over a year old, because I’d really like to get a comment conversation going over there. (Or here, that’s fine, too!) It seems to me that the author, Brian Fairbanks, didn’t really have much to say, so he excerpted one blog that was quoted on The Frisky. That’s it?? That’s all he’s got?? Out of ONEHUNDREDFORTYONEMILLION??


The point of the post, (in case you don’t want to read it) is that sex bloggers must be lying about their hot sex. Why? Because we’re anonymous? Because our sex is hot and his ISN’T? All 141,000,000 of us can’t be lying!!

Leave it to the commenters, though, to add a little OOMPH! One says, ”I know for a fact these are fake diaries.” WTF? I’d like to know just HOW s/he knows FOR A FACT. Is this commenter really the AUTHOR of the excerpts?
At the END of his article, Fairbanks admits that the story is “probably true” and that “we’re just jealous.” Jealous? We, who? Speak for yourself, buddy.

I’m not jealous, I’m BRAGGING!! I’m sure there are some fakes out there (“Ashley and Me” comes immediately to mind), but all of the sex bloggers I’ve ‘met’ are 100% real.  WE are 100% real. I think I can speak for Whitman when I say that we’re writing BECAUSE our sex is so amazing, it’s not amazing because we made it up!! 
I started thinking about creating a sex blog after reading a few regularly. I thought, “Well, what the hell? MY sex life is AT LEAST this hot! Put me in coach!!” The rest is history.

Mar 152011

mfc, cams, camgirls, aspenrae, jayln, pandora, averypearl, kansaskelly, lovelykittie, AustinWhite, kellyheart, astekangelA man friend of SexFairy recently said he spends his alone time “relaxing on the couch” which I suggested is a euphemism for masturbation. That got me thinking of my time “relaxing.”

And I recently read a post from our friends at AlexSuze suggesting we all should google Webcam Sluts. So where do I find my webcam sluts?mfc, cams, camgirls, aspenrae, jayln, pandora, averypearl, kansaskelly, lovelykittie, AustinWhite, kellyheart, astekangel

Mostly, at MyFreeCams, aka MFC. You can for free watch literally hundreds and hundreds of women in various states of exposure. Skinny, fat, busty, flat, American, Asian, eastern European,  you name it, it’s there.

Most sit and stare at their webcam waiting for someone to care, aka tip them money. Some dance.mfc, cams, camgirls, aspenrae, jayln, pandora, averypearl, kansaskelly, lovelykittie, AustinWhite, kellyheart, astekangel Some pole dance. Some take off their clothes, some put their clothes on. Some shower. Some write the names of their serious tippers on their bodies. Some will engage in light FF play, or FFF play, and FFFF play. A few even cook or drive their car while on cam. [Imagine getting PAID to take a shower, get dressed, cook some food, and drive.]

mfc, cams, camgirls, aspenrae, jayln, pandora, averypearl, kansaskelly, lovelykittie, AustinWhite, kellyheart, astekangelThe photo captures here were all taken directly from the site within a five minute period.  I left out the fugly’s for your voyeuristic approval.

While many times I’ll enjoy masturbating to the models,  other times I will just voyeur without purpose. On occasion SexFairy and I will both sit and look at the different women, see what they are doing, or not doing. We will judge, and critique. We will mock, and admire.    But regardless, we enjoy, together.

Check out MyFreeCams if you like. You don’t have to pay a cent, though like anything, membership has it’s privileges.

So what do you use to relax on the couch?

Mar 042011

charlie sheenSeriously. I am. Whitman has noted that it seems I’m obsessed with getting my next ‘fix’ of the Charlie Sheen meltdown. He’s right.  I am. I am one hundred percent fascinated. I feel sort of bad about it – I mean, the guy is OBVIOUSLY having a manic episode IF he’s not on mass amounts of cocaine.
(Maybe both – my God, what a combo THAT must be!)
I just can’t stop watching/reading/smiling about it, though. Schadenfreude? Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe I can just relate.

Something about the complete and utter ‘fuck you’-ness of his statements makes me grin like a nutjob myself.

I mean, really…who hasn’t wanted to (figuratively, or literally) flip the whole world a bird and scream,

I know I HAVE.

Actually, wait. I HAVE done this.
I had my own similar meltdown, years ago. Excessive drinking, cocaine, sex with people known and unknown, (singles, doubles, WHOEVER). Someone I barely know told me a few years after my “episode” that I had sex with an NFL player (AND his friend) in the attic storeroom of the local dive bar.  REALLY?! Amazing. I had a brush with fame, and had no. idea. whatsoever.
I was doing what and who I wanted when and where it counted most (which was whenever and wherever I wanted). This was totally unhealthy, OBVIOUSLY, and I wouldn’t want to relive it, but it sure seemed fun at the time.

“A drug called Charlie Sheen”? FUCK Yeah, I can totally relate.

Feb 282011

My teenaged kids have a running joke about things I like. It goes like this: “Mom gets off on sparkly things, cute packaging, Jimmy John’s subs, high heels…” You get the idea. They just add things on as I express excitement about, admiration for, or the desire to own something. It’s an ever-growing and completely random list. They think they’re funny. Sometimes they are.

Every time I hear this joke, I think “OMG, they have no idea!!” What mom GETS OFF ON are things like…well yes, high heels, but even  more so when they’re pushed back over my head; I so get off on having my ass spanked. HARD. I’m into sex blogging & sex toy reviewing, looking at naughty Tumblr porn, and sometimes watching really, REALLY DIRTY hardcore porn…like girls-choking-on-cocks porn. I especially like this porn while I’m on my knees sucking/choking on Whitman’s cock (so in THAT case, HE’S watching really dirty hardcore porn. I’m just an accessory). I love being on my knees, and I love being an accessory, actually – just used as a sex object, a fucktoy, a hole or two (or three…).

I get off on him choking me, slapping me, sitting on my chest with his back to  me and forcing me to orgasm repeatedly with the Hitachi and a crazy attachment, or torturing my nipples. The list goes on and on…

IMG_0494 (Large) - Copy

Seriously. They have NO. IDEA.

Feb 252011

I was at the gym today, doing girlie gym-things like cruising on the elliptical machine while listening to Eminem, when even over the music in my headphones I heard what sounded like a woman GIVING BIRTH. I looked in the mirror, and sure enough I could see the woman behind me working with a trainer. She was just GRUNTING and GROANING, and MOANING. She REALLY sounded like she was birthing. This was (not surprisingly) the same woman who I’d heard a few minutes earlier loudly whining and begging while running on the treadmill. (THAT incident made me want to laugh out loud, by the way…)

“Is she serious?” I thought. Why would someone do something so personal (or something that SOUNDS so personal) in public? I started thinking about the things I’d rather do in private that involve grunting, groaning and moaning, as well as whining and begging:

  1. Birth. Private.
  2. Embarrassing-noise-inducing exercise (girlie exercise doesn’t count. See above.)
    Definitely not in public.
  3. Sex. Sex noises. Embarrassing sex noises. I like to keep them to myself.

Public sex? Not me. Maybe this is part of the reason that (even though I REALLY DO live to please sexually) I’ve never really been that into group sex…because other people ARE THERE, watching and listening. I want to give myself over to the moment with complete abandon and not worry about who’s watching or who’s listening. My focus is on ONE PERSON. For the same reason, I’ve also never really thought the idea of sex at a swingers’ club would be that fun. I know Whitman wants to try it…he wants to try EVERYTHING, and I’m game to try EVERYTHING with him. Hmmmm…

I guess when the time comes, I’ll just have to BE in progress