I’m counting down to my surgery – FOUR DAYS!! Have I mentioned how excited I am??
This surgery isn’t my first ‘pussy procedure,’ though. About twenty years ago, I decided, “Well, if I’m going to have these giant labia, I should be proud of them.” I called my friend the midwife and asked what she thought about piercing one for me (This was just before the rise of body piercing professionals and studios). What she thought about it was that I was absolutely crazy. I then explained (and cajoled): “They’re just there. Like earlobes. Why not??” She finally gave in. I went to her office and she pierced me, inserted the jewelry, and made me promise never to tell anyone. I felt like I had a sexy secret in my panties for years, and then a couple of years ago, I just tired of it. I took the jewelry out. My lips went back to being unremarkable, except for their size.
And now, here I am. After years of gazing longingly at photos of neat little pussies without dangling lips, I’m about to have one of my own. I can picture exactly how I will look. My inner lips will just lightly ruffle along the outer lips, and not the other way around. For the past few weeks, every time I’ve been to the bathroom, I end up examining my lady lips. When I get undressed to shower, I play “let’s pretend”: I tuck the big parts in and smile at how it looks. I get excited about the surgery all over again.
All of a sudden, though, all I see are photos of big labia. They’re everywhere! (Have you seen Tumblr this week??) What if I miss mine when they’re gone? Will I spend the next twenty years mourning the loss of “a part of me”? Will I constantly be thinking or saying “I used to have big labia”? Will I regret this?